Jun 16, 2013

You can crush the flowers but you can't stop the spring, no matter what you say. So you can put the clouds up in your own little way, but the sun is gonna come up the very next day, it's gonna be so bright it's gonna blow you away.



 Hello world.  
I have been in such a psychedelic mood today - I'm relaxing, listening to The Flaming lips, working on my journal (I found some vintage National Geographics on a fleamarket, and they are from 1968 and 1967 and just freaking amazing!!) , pressing flowers, and then I went outside and took these pictures. They aren't edited, I just used some weird sunglasses and put then in front of the lense, and it creates such a awesome psychedelic vibe. It's like, a rainbow in every single photo! I love the way these turned out, and I am looking forward to more photo sets with those glasses! I hope you like these.

Also, Eva wrote this a few posts ago, and I kinda fell in love with that quote.
 Teendom is probably the biggest fantasy I could ever think to experience. It's just a completely symbolic time period. It's a symbol of freedom and rebellion and I just love everything being a teen stands for.

Have a great sunday, honeys.

Love,

Mary



Say hello to my cat. She's fat but she's the cutest.





 It's still early sunday morning, and I was to lazy to put anything special on, so I wore my new jumpsuit! I bought it on a fleamarket yesterday, and it's so cozy and summer-esque.
 Sorry for this weird pose. But I like how it looks like I have a gazillion arms.

 I think this one is a really pretty picture of me! 

 My cat which looks like a queen, or at least tries to. 
Um, I'm sorry for how I look in that picture. 


Jun 14, 2013

Flipping through all my teen magazines, brainwash me, believe in a fantasy. What to wear, how much to pay, style my hair, how much to weigh, hey hey hey, don’t be consumed - a false attitude is what they construe!



Hey guys! It has been a while. I guess I was busy with living, and with summer, or at least pretending it was summer. I have spent a lot of time with my friends, and we had so much fun. We went to a local park, took thousands of pictures and it was so great. Yesterday my boyfriend and I made ice cream and it tastes awesome! But I'm still dreaming of ice cream with Pizza flavor, haha.
I really like living currently. People sometimes don't suck as much as they usually do, the school year is not that long anymore, the weather is getting better and my record player is amazing and I have been listening to the Rookie flexidisc all day long. Sometimes I totally feel teenage-esque, you know, including flower crowns, ice cream and angstiness. It feels good. Sometimes, I am surprised about how great life can be, how nice some people are. Though, I feel like the gap between extremely great people and super stupid ones is getting bigger. A girl in our class said, a few days ago, that a gay couple and a child can't be a family, when we spoke about gay rights and feminism. I was so shocked about how disgustingly intolerant people can be. I mean, how can you say such a thing? Why wouldn't two men and a child be a family? A lot of feminist issues have been on my mind lately.
Well, let's get to my outfit! I finally managed to sew a dress! It turned out awesome, and I am really really proud of it. It's dark green velvet, aka one of the coolest fabrics ever. It's really ~floaty~ and teen-witch-y. There's also a zipper! As I am an sewing beginner, I'm really happy that the zipper turned out really good. It also has a nice fit. And I have always wanted  a dress which looks like this when you are spinning around:

Isn't that amazing? Anyways, I am also wearing a few bracelets from when I was younger, and three rings I found today, in a little boy where I used to keep my jewelery in. It's a lion and a cat ring, both with goggly eyes! And a one with just one super cute goggly eye. The shoes are from Asos and the socks from a trip to Spain. I put on black lipstick, for, kinda, teen witch vibes (Just came to my mind, I watched Teen Witch! It's perfect! I really recommend it to you guys.) . 

I hope you are all fine!

Love,

Mary

Jun 6, 2013

They put you down, they say Im wrong - you tacky thing, you put them on! Rebel rebel, you've torn your dress, Rebel rebel, your face is a mess, Rebel rebel, how could they know?

Hello! Yesterday was a ~very special day~. It was my one-year-blogging-anniversary! I can't believe it has been such a long time since I started this blog. I remember how freaking exited I was when I started it - I had been thinking about starting a blog for half a year before I finally did. I kept a journal full of ideas and layouts and posts for months, and I wrote about a gazillion first posts. I have never regret starting this blog, like never. I love blogging - sure, it's a lot of work, and I never blog regularly, but I put this blog together with all my heart and soul. I am really proud of my blog, and I think it changed me a lot.
Blogging made me way more self-confident - my style has changed and developed a lot. I am just clicking through my blog, hitting "older posts" for the 10000. time. I am quite embarrassed by a few posts, but there are some which I really loved and had so much fun putting them together. It's crazy how much my style has changed during this year - I got so much braver, and tougher, and brave enough to wear really "weird" clothes. I gained so much self-confidence and I don't care about whatever people might say about my style. Strange people on the street come to me telling me that I look super awesome, and that's just such a great feeling. I definitely am a freak - but hey, I am proud! Blogging brought me to so much super cool stuff. I would have never discovered that kind of Rookie style, or all those awesome gals from the wandering collective. I have made so many new friends through the internet. It's a great way to find people who are also "different". I wish our little grrl gang could exist in reality. The internet is also full of inspiration for not only my style, but also for living in general (if that makes sense). My blog means so much for me! You would never believe it.
I want to explain why I dress the way I do. It's a lot about being different. In my first post, I wrote this: I'm trying hard not to look like everybody. Fashion is not only for being accepted or "cool" or something, it is a way to express who you are and who you want to be. It is about showing your identity. And this is still what I am thinking. It's like, everything I wear screams out "That is me and I don't care what you think!". Dressing different need some courage, especially in a conservative area like I was born in (unfortunately). But it's kind of a logical consequence of being individual - I am different and I want to show it to everybody. Recently, I put on some really "mainstream" stuff, and I looked at myself in the mirror and I hated it. I didn't feel comfortable at all, it's just not me. Another reason for dressing weird is that I just like it. I think it's amazing, and that's it.
Blogging is awesome, I love it so much. Basically, I want to hug everyone who reads this. All your comments and mails are utterly cute, and you always make my day. You are great and I love you.
Here are some posts I especially liked:

This one is the coolest post on my blog, I guess.
I love this, this and that outfit. And this one.
This is something about me.
My zines, Tavi and Rookie.

That's it! Thank you so much for reading my blog, it means so much to me. My blog has become a huge part of my life.

Jun 3, 2013

Capri Sun and plastic guns, welcome to our oblivion. Hanging out, and having fun- we were always down, always will be down, we were always down staring at the sunset.


Hey honeys! It has been forever (again) since I last posted. Anyways, here's a ~very special~ outfit post. It's special because of the unicorns. And David Bowie. I really like this outfit, actually! I think it's kinda my style in one outfit, like a mix of Rebel Girl by Bikini Kill and Reasons to be beautiful by Hole and Always by Erase. Well, I am wearing my fishnet socks from Spain, super cute jelly flats from the thrift store, a tulle skirt from when I was eight or somethin', a gifted blouse, a DIYed studded collar that you can't really see, and, most important, my brandnew Unicorn jumper! Just to make sure you got it, Unicorn jumper. I DIYed it today and I am just in love with it. It's super cozy and unicorn-ly. The tie dye jumper is actually from Primark, and I ironed that unicorn picture on today (I own this really awesome textil print foil to iron prints on clothing). Here's a closeup of the unicorn:


HOW CUTE IS THAT. Everybody thinks I am a freak because I believe in unicorns. I am still trying to figure out where they are. Anyways:



I went on a really big fleamarket last weekend! I found no clothing, can you believe it? But I found so many records! I love love love my record player. I own some singles from Led Zeppelin, they were three bucks each and with the songs Rock'n Roll, Immigrant song, Four sticks and Hey Hey what can I do. It sounds so different played with a record player, much cooler and more original. I also bought Space Oddity by David Bowie! Being a huge Bowie fan, I totally freaked out when I found it. It has several scratches but it still sounds great. And some jerk drew Bowie a beard, as you can see. Well, I also was given a Bob Dylan record, and the record of the concert in Central park by Simon and Garfunkel! It's utterly beautiful and I have been listening to it all day long. Sound of Silence is such a beautiful song. Also, a friend lent me The Rocky Horror Picture Show! I love that musical, and "Sweet Transvestite" is so amazing.

Hope you are all fine!

Mary

May 27, 2013

When she talks, I hear the revolutions, in her hips, there's revolutions, when she walks, the revolution's coming, in her kiss, I taste the revolution, Rebel girl, Rebel girl - you are the queen of my world!


Every text written on this blog (except the last one) includes a speech of apologizing for being such a bad blogger which sucks. I literally only post once a week currently, which drives me crazy. When I started blogging, I used to update this blog every second day. Maybe it's because I don't know what to wear, or because I have not that much clothing, or just because I am kinda busy these days. Or at least I should be busy, but I am just procastinating. The whole day, today, actually. But I am allowed to as we are having holidays right now. Yay for holidays. Anyways, I am really tired right now and writing this blog seems so narcissistic and stupid. Because actually, I am such a freak and on the internet so many people are like "omg u r so cool" which I am not. I kinda feel like I am lying at you, so I thought I'd share some stuff which is important for me. 
- I am vegetarian, and it's very important to me. I really believe in it. I haven't eaten meat (or anything containing stuff for which animals have died (directly)) for seven years and I will never eat meat again.
- I almost never paint my nails. Well, actually, they are always painted but not accurately and the whole polish peels off. 
- I am so chaotic, you would never believe it.
- I realized yesterday I am the biggest loser ever and it even makes me a loser to realize it that late, as I really am.
Woohoo. 
Let's get back to normal blogging. I am feeling so many different vibes currently! It's crazy. I want to be a hippie, a punk rocker, a grunge grrl, and a japanese kawaii babe. So I try to be everything at the same time, as I don't really want to belong to one group. I don't want to be categorized because I want to be individual, if that makes sense. So, I love the hippie vibes, and I want to walk barefeet with flowers in my hair and tie dye dresses, and wear forehead jewelery and listen to reggae. I think about dreading my hair sometimes, and I feel so ~woodstock-esque~ (but I'm to uncool to be on a festival right now, but it's on my to-do-list for this summer!). I want to feel summer and dance around like a hippie. And I would, if it wasn't that cold. 12 degrees. Can you believe that? It's supposed to be summer right now! Or at least late, very late, spring. Which brings me to... I don't know what to wear. Everything is either to warm or to cold. Well, today I put together this outfit. I was trying to be Enid Coleslaw from Ghost World, she's wearing a daisy shirt and a plaid skirt with boots on the book cover, and I added some hippie vibes with the fringe booties. I made this daisy jumper the other day, and I really love it! I used fake flowers and an old jumper from the thrift store, I guess. It only took me a few minutes, but I really love it and it's so cozy. The skirt is from my sister and she'll probably kill me for wearing it, but I like it. I have been searching for a pleated and plaid printed skirt, but I just can't find one! These shoes are new, I bought them together with my best buddy in Nürnberg. They feel really hippie-esque and the fringes swing nicely when you walk. And I put some bracelets on my ankles.
Congratulations for reading this post. I bet it was not easy to make your way through it as I am talking mainly bullshit. Anyways, I hope you are all fine!

Love,

Mary

 I was kinda sorta trying to be cute but I guess I failed.
fancy closeup. they look actually really cute.

May 22, 2013

I'm worse at what I do best, and for this gift I feel blessed, our little group has always been and always will until the end!

Hey lovely people. This is a piece I wrote for The Wanderinga feminist and art collective. I think it's a really important topic, and I want to spread the word. Thank you for reading.

Get out your time machine, we are going on a journey. The lights are blinking, and we are in 1955 again, in a suburb, in front of the vinyl shop. Adults are staring at you, whispering to each other about the strange kids over there. You don't give a shit. You smoke your cigarette, like women do in movies, with elegance. You smooth out a crease in your polka dotted dress with your petticoat underneath. Smiling, you look at this boy with his Elvis-like hairdo and his worn-out jeans. You are both rebels. Sick of the boring, stuffy, narrow-minded thinking of your parents. Elvis Presley is your hero, with his new way of dancing, of singing. You want to be different, to be happy, you are the youth and you are celebrating it. You guys are rock'n roll.

Flashback '68. It's a new era. There's revolution and rebellion in the air, maybe mixed with a little scent of weed. People are demonstrating, going on the streets, struggeling for the end of the war in Vietnam, for gender equality, for peace. They are peaceful, though, with psychedelic prints, sandals, flowers in their hair. They revolt against the hate, the greed, the capitalism destroying people in our world. They are living in communes, listening to psychedelic rock music. Using acid, LSD, or weed to explore all states of consciousness, they embrace life and happiness. They also celebrate a new way of sexuality, see sex as something natural and great, don't hide it like it was used to do by society. They call themselves Hippies. Festivals like Woodstock changed the world of music, actually, hippies changed even more. Music, fashion, politics got different. With peaceful demonstrations, they were a new kind of youth, showed a new kind of living, revolted against war.

We go on on our travel through time. It's 1977. There's a group of young women, talking. Yelling, sometimes. They are kind of angry, and want changes. They fight for gender equality, against sexism. These are strong women, revolting women, surprising the sexist society with their strength. They help each other, they are proud of being women, they achieve many important things. Feminists demonstrated against sexism, starting a movement that hasn't ended at all in the present.

Time machine brings us to 1994. You are sitting in your room, your whole makeup is smeared all over your face by your tears. Nirvana music floats through your house, making you painfully realize that Kurt Cobain will never sing again. You cry because he has just shot himself, because Grunge ended abrupt with one bullet. You think of the last few years. Desillusionated, overwhelmed by society, blurred. There were no special goals, but there was a movement. There was „a burnout feeling amongst teens, they were kind of depressed about the future“ (music critics words), and Grunge provocated. The fashion was simple, cheap and the exact opposite of flashy neon styles in the 1980s. Grunge was filled with angst, alienation, and longing for freedom.


Back to present. Look around. There's nothing. In the past, there always was a movement amongst young people. It started with music, just take Woodstock or Elvis Presley, and then continued in other cultural aspects like fashion, it got politic, changed something. There always was a movement, kind of a big thing, something to identify with. There were role models, music you lived with. Demonstrations, emotions. Teens identified with movements like second-wave-feminism, or the Hippie culture. All these groups were somehow political – they expressed the feelings of young people.
Being young, growing up means that something changes, and the youth itself always changed something. There is a desire amongst teens to revolt, to change something, to be rebels, and this desire was always there. And today? There is no movement, no action. Well, actually, there is so much. Maybe that's the point behind it all – there is too much wrong that needs to be changed. There is sexism, our climate suffers extremly under us humans, there is so much unfairness and poverty, and there is still war, there is this pointless consuming. But it's like the whole youth is asleep. Sure, there are a few feminists, and a few people who fight for our environment, there are still Punks and hippies. However, these are all relicts, fading memories of earlier movements. There's a lack of something new. We all need something to change, we all need to wake up. Society is blind. Everybody walks around, eyes closed, masking out the problems. We live in a consumer society. Teens are fed with materialist things, clothes, technical stuff, and they are so replete that there is no space for thinking anymore. On my endless travel through the internet, I found a picture which says „I shop therefore I am.“. That's all of the thinking which is done nowadays. As long as we have enough possessions, we don't care about anything else. There are way too less people which think. As long as they have money, materialist things, they don't think about anything else. But are they happy that way? Can you be happy without thinking? I can't. We all pretend to be, to fit into society, and most teenagers forget to think this way. There is no desire for changes anymore. Only a few people are longing for something new, but as there is nothing to identify with, they hold on to old movements, trying to change as much as they did. But they are just too less people. We need to open our eyes. We teens need something to change. Teenagehood is the age where you figure out what you want, who you are, and what you need, but how could it work without changes? Teens were always able to identify with something, to fit into a group by protesting. It's hard to figure out who you are without movements like those. If you at least want to figure out who you are, you have to do it all by yourself. And if you come to the conclusion that things need to change, you are completely powerless. You can still feel some Grunge vibes today – we are longing for freedom. But being overwhelmed, we don't know how to change something, we can't identify with something. All we do is escaping from the present, to the past, full of desperate nostalgia, or just feeding ourselves with materialism so we don't feel the longing for freedom anymore. Youth needs to change something. We can't just suppress our desire for changes. We need to revolt, to rebel against todays issues. But with what can we identify? The youth needs to open its eyes.

May 18, 2013

And the head said that you always were a queer one from the start, for careers you say you want to be remembered for your art.


It's finally holidays. I haven't really realized it yet, it seems surreal and too good. The past few weeks have been so angsty and full of eating too much because of frustration. I can't stand the thought of having to go to school in two weeks again. I hate it. Normally, I don't use the word "hate" to often, it seems so hard and whatever, but I really mean it. I hate school. I have been in such an angsty mood for weeks. I want something to happen. I feel so sad all the time because of stuff happening in this world, and I want to change something, I want a movement to identify with, I want to know where I belong. I don't want to live in my tiny bubble anymore, I want something new. Life gets very extreme - some days I am utterly happy and smile all the time, and some days I am so sad and frustrated. I don't know if the tears on my face mean I'm happy or sad. I feel overwhelmed and confused. Confusion is everywhere I look. I don't understand humanity. Because of all that frustration, I am just escaping into my bed watching Teen Witch and Daria, and stalking blogs. I feel so frustrated that I feel bad about blogging - I don't want to smile in outfit pictures, for why should I if I don't feel happy? I end up not posting anything for five days and then I feel so bad, like I can't do anything right. I don't really know what may help me to get our of that mood. Maybe I just need to get out of here. To a sunny place or something. Maybe I should be less busy. All that feelingsorryformyself even makes it all worse. I feel sorry about feeling sorry for myself because other people have problems way more important than my own. But seeing and realizing all this sadness around me makes me cry, and no one understands.
Ohmy. This is so angsty.
I just needed to write it down somewhere.
It's getting sunny outside which is nice. And I could be bothered to put something on, which looks not like I'm the most desperate and unmotivated person ever (at least I hope so). I'm sorry for all this blahblah in that post which should orginally show an outfit and some new stuff I've got. I went thrifting the other day and bought ~the most perfect summer shoes ever~. They are so cute! They are pink and from the 70ies and jelly shoes! I have been searching for similar ones for weeks, but the ones I found were hella expensive. And now I have found jelly shoes, really cute ones, for three bucks! Furthermore, they fit perfectly. This is why I love thrift stores. Well, the shorts were DIYed last summer from a pair of men's jeans found in a thrift store. The colourful shirt was a gift from a friend, it's kinda seventies. And I DIYed the shirt today! I have a slightly creepy obsession with eyeballs. I used a tumblr picture and printed it on the top with textil foile stuff. It turned out great, in my opinion. The fishnet socks are from Spain, and the sunglasses are from the thrift store, too. They are really 70ies. Maybe I'm in a 70ies phase right now. Oh sweet nostalgia.
So this was a really long post. Whatever! Thank you if you read it.

Love,

Mary